How to find Chuck Norris::
- Look around.
- You won't find Chuck Norris.
- But Chuck Norris has found you!
How to be a texting adult:
- spell out all the words
- ask what they mean when they write LOL , TTYL, or any other abreviation
- use out of date slang like "That's far out" or "Groovey"
How to Present A Speech:
- Play Sci-fi Music.
- Get A Deep Voice.
- Begin With, "In A World..."
How to Study for a Test:
- Open the book.
- Read the book.
- Decide the book is boring and write the answers backwards on your desk.
How to solve a Rubik's cube:
- Make a few random turns.
- End up solving one side of the cube.
- Peel off the stickers and stick them back on.
How to be obsessive :
- Pick a topic to obsess over
- Collect EVERYTHING made about./ for it.
- If you ever see it or, someone else talking about it, giggle and began blabbing about it to anyone near
How to sell tons of fundraiser stuff:
- Find a cute little child
- Bribe them with candy to sell stuff
- Sit back, relax, and get prizes for selling stuff
How to Make a Date miserable:
- fall asleep at the movie and snore really loud.
- Eat your meal with your hands.
- Instead of kissing them goodbye, lick them like a dog.
How to be a monkey:
- Scratch places in public, that really aren't mean't to be scratched in public.
- Lay around naked all day with staring people peering in at you.
- Two words: Throw, Poo!
How to finally go to sleep:
- Turn off the computer.
- Go to bed and try to sleep.
- Turn on your computer again to check something you remembered.
How to sound smart:
- Get a dictionary.
- Look up a complicated word.
- Start using it, and everyone will believe that you are smart.
How to be a BLONDE:
- Write on your computer screen with permanent marker instead of the keyboard.
- Walk into a glass sliding door.
- Go to the pizza shop and order a pizza, tell the man that you want six slices, because you could never eat twelve!
More How to get kicked out of Walmarts:
- Go into the changing room and after a while, loudly shout "There's no toliet paper in here!"
- Every time the loud speakers can be heard, duck down and shout, "It's those voices again!"
- Hide in the clothes racks and when someone walks by, shout "Pick me, Pick me!"
How to get kicked out of Wal-Mart:
- Ride the bicycles through the aisles, screaming at the top of your lungs
- Ask every employee you see if they will push you in a shopping cart
- Take clothes from different departments and mix them up (swap boxers for bras)
How to piss off your waiter..:
- Change your order two, no,.. three times.
- Complain, complain, complain.
- Dont leave a tip
How to professionally waste time:
- See Step 2
- See Step 3
- Go back to Step 1
How to get lots of candy on halloween.:
- Get a very scary costume.
- Go up so a little kid and scare them.
- Hopefully they will drop the loot so you can take it.
How to be a creep:
- wear dark colours
- smile really wide
- hang around behind doors and in corners
How to make the :d emoticon in real life:
- Stretch your tongue out.
- Roll your tongue over your upper lip and keep stretching.
- Lick your nose.
How to Be a King:
- Proclaim yourself king
- Threaten to kill anyone who opposes you
- Have someone else kill everyone who opposes you
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© 2010 Tiffany "Shadowfiles" Zhang -- About -- Contact