How to survive a bombing.:
- Dont die
How to be a Nobody from Kingdom hearts:
- Get an unrealistic weapon or make it out of cardboard
- Grow your hair long in an awesome hairstyle
- Create a random nickname, like everyone else does
How to ride a dragon:
- Distract the dragon with something that looks like treasure
- get on the dragon before it realizes you dont really have treasure
- hold on really tight and if you live the first 10 secounds you did good.
How to go into disguise:
- draw a mini mustash on your finger
- quickly put it across your face like a mustash
- change your voice
How to ba AMAZING at java:
- dont listen to the book
- the internet is your friend
- use the genius of the people who actually pay attention in class >.>
How to look smart in Biology (even if your not):
- Just about every tool that you don't know the name of call "the device"
- Seriously all professionals do it just type on google
- Your teacher will think your smart and intune with the field
How to be a vampire:
- Be sure to sparkle plenty!
- NEVER EVER shower
- do everything that vampires absolutely DO NOT do.
How to catch a mouse:
- Run around screaming and jumping onto the mouse and only use your hands to try and catch it.
- Set up a shoddy mouse trap with cheese, but you won't catch anything because real mice like honey and peanut spread.
- Set up elaborate traps so that the mouse will be caught, but of course the mouse is smarter and gets away. A lot like mouse trap, really.
How to be a mobster:
- buy a fedora
- wear pinstripes
- talk like the bad guys on crime shows
How to show off.:
- Brag about your major accomplishments.
- Tell them classic tales of how you epicly win.
- If they dont believe you, steal a trophie/ribbon/metal of one of your family members who actually did something, and declare it as yours. (Keep name and date hidden)
How to stay home faking you're sick:
- Come out in the morning looking tired and unalive
- Fake a nasty cough and talk like it hurts to do so
- Go into the bathroom like five times and say you got sick each time
How to procrastinate:
- see step 2
- see step 3
- see step 1
How to entertain with chipmunks:
- find a spot where they congregate
- scatter Flaming Hot Jalapino Cheetos on the ground
- Sit very still and watch as they have no clue what just hit them and are stupid enough to try it more than once after already burning their mouth
How to be a Time Lord (Doctor Who):
- Be born on Gallifrey
- Earn, or steal a TARDIS(Time Machine)
- IF someone kills you, turn into a completely different person and freak out about your new face
How to make life a musical. :
- Run outside and sing your emotions. Expect to have magical backup dancers appear as you go down the street.
- Sing passionately about the groceries you're buying in the store.
- Make an awkward situation less (or more?) awkward by singing about it.
How to make a left turn:
- Turn right.
- Turn right.
- Turn right.
How to live like a wild horse:
- Be brave and fearless.
- Go wherever you want.
- Eat grass.
How to be a MC Hammer fan:
How to make a kid cry:
- Drop his ice cream and don't say sorry
- Offer to play a game with them
- Don't lose on purpose like your supposed to and when you win yell "Yeah old people rule!"
How to accidently kill someone:
- Give me a drill.
- Put me somewhere with people in it.
- ...lets just say I cant use a drill.
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© 2010 Tiffany "Shadowfiles" Zhang -- About -- Contact